Your oddest job?

7360 Views 56 Replies 46 Participants Last post by mc handyman, Jan 17, 2010

abacab

Discussion Starter · Jan 10, 2010

Was going to post this in the oddest expense thread, but thought it better to start a new thread.
For me it was working in the embalment room at a funeral home. There were dead bodies lying there:shutup:, covered only up to the neck. I was chipping out tile and got a few chunks on them. They did work on the bodies while I was there, and their kids ran in and out of the room during this time.

1 - 20 of 57 Posts

Higgs

· #2 · Jan 10, 2010

creapy dude

Cole82

· #3 · Jan 10, 2010

An adult swing in the basement of a house with 2 wives and one husband.

Second was a hand rail in a topless bar. The girls were very thankful as it led to there dressing room.

Zinsco

· #4 · Jan 10, 2010

A few years ago I was involved in installing large indoor HID lighting systems (24+ KW) for local gardeners.

Metro M & L

· #5 · Jan 10, 2010

Zinsco said:
A few years ago I was involved in installing large indoor HID lighting systems (24+ KW) for local gardeners.

You should keep that to yourself.

BTW I recently deducted 35k worth of lighting as capital improvement expenses to my home business.

Reactions: 1

Metro M & L

· #6 · Jan 10, 2010

Cleaning out a junkies rental. The laundry room had clothing and dog crap piled about five feet high (that is not an exageration it was to my shoulder and took four hours to empty that 10x10 room).

So gross. I made sure to check all of the snake cages carefully; drug dealers are known to do something as stupid as keep venomous snakes around the house. Now that I think of it I'm surprised I didn't run into one underneath the pile in the laundry room.

bdoles

· #7 · Jan 10, 2010

Gave an estimate for a roof replacement in the city. Once up on the roof, it looked like swiss cheese. There were at least 10 bullets still stuck in the roof. Another 5 or so went clear through into the attic space.

What goes up, must come down - idiot crackheads!!

Schmidt & Co

· #8 · Jan 10, 2010

abacab said:
Was going to post this in the oddest expense thread, but thought it better to start a new thread.
For me it was working in the embalment room at a funeral home. There were dead bodies lying there:shutup:, covered only up to the neck. I was chipping out tile and got a few chunks on them. They did work on the bodies while I was there, and their kids ran in and out of the room during this time.

Same thing for me. A few years ago we painted a few funeral homes. Creepy as hell!

One morning I was doing some touch-up painting in one of the rooms prior to the service. They aready had the body in there and I happened to notice that it was leaking embalming fluid at the head. I let the funeral director know and he let it keep leaking on the pillow. Just before the family came in, he just flips the pillow over!

bdoles

· #9 · Jan 10, 2010

Schmidt & Co said:
I happened to notice that it was leaking embalming fluid at the head.

"Caulk it"! :thumbup:

Reactions: 5

Pearce Services

· #10 · Jan 10, 2010

I once had to rebuild a wooden dam (the ones with removable boards to control the height of the pond), it came out nice, but was leaking like crazy between the removable boards.

The only reason the original didn't leak was because it was locked up with plastic shopping bags and other nasty debris. The solution...shovel all the debris back into the pond, and press it all against the boards, and it was tight as could be after that. I sure didn't have the proper workwear for that job.

eXpatRioteX

· #11 · Jan 10, 2010

I had to install door handles and closures and fabricate movable interior walls for a burn building/shoot house. It was used by the fire department and swat teams for training. It was a short job, but a neat location.

jamesclerie

· #12 · Jan 10, 2010

www youtube com/watch?v=876rLi7xpX0
Doing some work in a house the home owners asked if I could see what was going on in there wall.

Zinsco

· #13 · Jan 10, 2010

Ya know, reading about bullet holes in the ceiling reminded me of a machine I was called in to rewire the control system of. It was a giant shear, a razor sharp blade 6' wide blade that would cut a stack of magazines a foot thick.

It was very powerful and operated very quickly when a large, mushroom shaped button was pressed, the man operating this machine had reached under the blade to reposition the material to be cut and in doing so accidentally pressed the actuator button by leaning against it. The machine instantly cycled and chopped off both his hands...

OSHA cited them and I was called in to create a safer control system. It was pretty grizzly, there was blood everywhere. I installed 2 buttons in series back away from the cutting table and 3 feet apart. It now takes two hands to operate that machine.

I always felt real sorry for that guy.

Fence & Deck

· #14 · Jan 10, 2010

One that comes to mind was a $9000 dog run.
About 15 years ago, I was contracted to put in a 50' long chain link dog run.
I wrote the contract, took the deposit, and scheduled the job. The night before we started, the HO called me in tears and sobbing uncontrolably. The German SHepard we were building the run for had died of a heart attack.
However, he wanted me to build it anyway. We did, but it sure felt weird building such an expensive dog run for a dead dog!
He kept adding to it. We wound up building it 50'x5' long, with pea gravel over filter cloth for the whole run, an elaborate gate and closer, patio stones for the owner to walk up and down cleaning up poop, a 5x6 wood deck for the dog to recline on, and a small roof to give shade.
About a week after we finished, he called and invited me down to meet the new replacement dog and have a drink to celebrate. Of course I went.

Had another one once where a 10' high privacy screen was needed so that the neighbours couldn't see the wife and teenage daughter sunbathe.
We finished the job and I went to collect the cheque. Got to the house, where a note on the front door directed me to the back, where both women greeted me completely nude, cheque in hand!.
Ah well, different concepts of privacy, I suppose!

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Reactions: 3

deckman22

· #15 · Jan 10, 2010

I built an outdoor skating rink for a TV station a few years ago. Plexiglass was installed on top of the platform I made & they skated on that.

Tinstaafl

· #16 · Jan 10, 2010

jamesclerie said:
Doing some work in a house the home owners asked if I could see what was going on in there wall.

So how much per pound was that honey? :laughing:

I think I'd have tried smoking 'em before opening that up. :thumbsup:

galla35

· #17 · Jan 11, 2010

ive done work in a funeral home too :/ and had to give a hand wheeling some bodies around it was weird

Bergstrom

· #18 · Jan 11, 2010

The company that I used to work for built cabinets for the Illinois Department of Corrections. I was reading the paper one morning several years ago and there was a story about the execution chamber where Timothy McVeigh was going to get his injection. Sure enough the picture showed one of our fine cabinets with a slightly crooked drawer front right next to table.

I figure that will be the last thing that I see before I die as well and I haven't even broken any laws...hopefully the drawer front will be straight :laughing:

thom

· #19 · Jan 11, 2010

Using a vac on those bees was a shame. I've done it with africanized bees but otherwise it's a waste.

A beekeepers suit and some smoke would have left those bees fat and happy. Then just cut out the hives, put them in a proper hive box, and you have a real bee colony.

Reactions: 2

EES

· #20 · Jan 11, 2010

I was working in an autopsy room at a hospital. They had a glass front fridge in there and you could see a bunch of organs in there. I jiggled the fridge and the guy I was working with got a little mad. Then I looked at the table and tried to figure out where there would be spatter that wouldn't be seen during normal cleaning. Sure enough I found some spatter that looked like it got thrown off the bone saw and pointed it out to him. He got so pissed he left and I finished myself. It's too bad, he missed them rolling a body into the walk in.

Oh and a long long time ago I was in NJ installing a humongous oven at a restaurant. There had been a rest. there before, but had been closed down. The wife's family was connected. They didn't like it that the husband was selling drugs, but when he started hitting the wife that was the end of it. They came in and blasted him. You could see holes in the door to the kitchen where they must have winged him. Then there were 3 holes in the tile in a close triangle where they finished him as he lay on the floor. Or at least that's the story the building owner gave me.

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