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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hey Guys,

in training for a site supervisor/field management role, my boss the builder is quite hard with me, applies a lot of pressure, and trains me with a lot of toughness, which I am not that used to (while having to respond with answers to everything on the spot). I have been there 3 days...welcome to the game i guess before this i was doing home remodels on the tools.

1) How do I deal with this? Mentally...what do I respond with, is there a go-to response for 'your s*' or 'you should f know this? how do i professionally or not so professionally deal with this - i think he expects a tough response or something.

2) how do i find my voice here?

3) how do i work under pressure on the spot??


Super organised supervisor here, currently at the initial stages of the build, and building 3 double story homes.
But I just started the job, and its been 2 days and im putting in extra hours outside of work (normal i know) to get a good understanding of plans, specifications, customers, trade tick sheets etc.

this is my career, i want to develop into the person who can handle anything as a GC or as a field supervisor...
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Your boss tells you you're $h1t? If so, I'd tell him I f#$%rd his wife in the a$$ and she liked it.

Never, ever, tolerate that type of disrespect.
Yeah I know, but can i say that back to my boss? not sure what to do here
 

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Either straighten him out or quit. An ******* boss makes every day suck. I had one once when I was a pup, I put up with it for months before I blew up, backed him up against the wall and screamed in his face. He developed an entirely new management style after that, much calmer, and more understanding of the people that worked for him.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Either straighten him out or quit. An *** boss makes every day suck. I had one once when I was a pup, I put up with it for months before I blew up, backed him up against the wall and screamed in his face. He developed an entirely new management style after that, much calmer, and more understanding of the people that worked for him.
I cant quit this is a position that theyre going to train me in and its hard to find these field supervisor jobs.. how do i straighten him out?
 

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I wouldn't scream, makes you as small a man as he is.
I would very calmly and quietly inform him, that is no way to talk to another man, and if it happens again, there WILL be consequences.

Thing is, you have to mean it, and have the guts to back it up....

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“Who are you talking to you? I’m certain you’re not talking to me.”

If you respond to him in the way he expects, you are feeding the monster.


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I wouldn't scream, makes you as small a man as he is.
I would very calmly and quietly inform him, that is no way to talk to another man, and if it happens again, there WILL be consequences.

Thing is, you have to mean it, and have the guts to back it up....

Sent from my SM-G965U1 using Tapatalk
This is the right approach. I let it go to far and ended up responding poorly.
 

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Sometimes a screamer will only listen to another screamer if they're in a subordinate position.

I can put the fear of Satan into people (unless they are a legit badass) when I raise my voice.

Maybe go off on the azzhole and then finish off in the nice voice with "see, it's no fun to be yelled at, is it?"

Showing you can play that game too, but you didn't actually lose self control.

Don't be afraid to lose your job.
Don't ever be afraid of anything.

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The Dude
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You say you need this job, and I get that. I've been there. Unfortunately tolerating that nonsense won't help anything. It'll continue until you have no confidence or hope left. You should 100% be looking for other jobs, and financially preparing yourself for the eventuality that you get fired or have to walk. One or the other are highly likely with a garbage boss like that. It's only a matter of time. Dude isn't going to change.

You're not being trained, you're being brainwashed into being the guys whipping boy.
 

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Kowboy
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Seriously, maybe at a time in the morning when everyone's cool, privately and calmly tell your boss (tell, don't ask) that his speaking to you is inappropriate and will stop beginning immediately. Ask if he understands, then shake hands on it.

You cannot be afraid of losing your job. If he smells the least bit of fear, you're back to being his dog.
 

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The Dude
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For a while, I thought that was just how it was in construction. it is not. He's not the only game in town, and it's not easy to find and keep help right now. If you take Kowboys advice (which is really solid IMHO) be prepared to act. There is a chance dude will pipe up with "I'LL TALK TO YOU HOWEVER TF I WANT, I'M THE BOSS AND YOU'RE JUST A PEON!" ... in which case, the best course of action would be to just say Ok then! grab your gear, and leave. Go straight to every other game in town and talk to them - find another job.
 

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The Dude
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So I saw the recommended post here - 4 months ago. Wanting to be a foreman/site manager but told I'm...

Idk what Australia is like, but at least here there's a big difference between somebody saying some rough stuff, pushing you hard to do better (a good old fashioned ribbing) vs them cutting you down like a dog. If they can't take it being thrown right back at them - it's the latter and I won't tolerate one iota of it. But I do have some thick skin, and can take (and dish right back out) some crude banter. But if they get all pissy when its dished back at them it says a lot about their character.
 

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I don’t think that you said if your awful boss is the business owner or not, just saying that if he is not, after speaking with him respectfully regarding his conduct, regardless of his response, I would promptly go to the companies owner and honestly let him know what is going on with his management. Try to keep the emotion out of it, just the facts. If the owner lets on that he knows about it at all or if your toddler boss is the owner I think it’s time to do what most everyone else recommended and start talking to the competition today.


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Hey Guys,

in training for a site supervisor/field management role, my boss the builder is quite hard with me, applies a lot of pressure, and trains me with a lot of toughness, which I am not that used to (while having to respond with answers to everything on the spot). I have been there 3 days...welcome to the game i guess before this i was doing home remodels on the tools.

1) How do I deal with this? Mentally...what do I respond with, is there a go-to response for 'your s*' or 'you should f know this? how do i professionally or not so professionally deal with this - i think he expects a tough response or something.

2) how do i find my voice here?

3) how do i work under pressure on the spot??


Super organised supervisor here, currently at the initial stages of the build, and building 3 double story homes.
But I just started the job, and its been 2 days and im putting in extra hours outside of work (normal i know) to get a good understanding of plans, specifications, customers, trade tick sheets etc.

this is my career, i want to develop into the person who can handle anything as a GC or as a field supervisor...
Been doing this a long time. Dont let the pressure get to you. Pressure on a job is a made up construct of your mind.

You will do the best job you can given the current and future things thrown your way. Then you will learn from your mistakes and do better each and every job. This will make you the superintendent that everyone wants to hire but no one can afford.

Now that is out of the way, let me ask you. Is his/her way the way you think the job should be done? If not, then do it differently.

I once had a boss like that. He actually told me this when I asked him a question: "If you go to a cathouse, do you use your d*ck or someone elses? Oh, I was so mad. Ready to quit and punch him out. I didn't know what to do so I just did what I knew. I gave direction to any and every sub that asked me. I never asked his permission. A few weeks later he wanted to know why this sub was doing a certain thing "this way". I told him "I asked him to do it that way. I was using my own d*ck."

He actually laughed and clapped me on the back. 8 months later they shipped him off to a simple tilt-up prison job (5 million) and left me to finish the 100 million dollar hospital. Today, he is no longer here and working for peanuts with a smaller company and I am still here making top dollar. This was 12 years ago and my first time as asst super.

Stick to what you know will work. Take what you can from everyone. Everyone can teach you something. Even the idiots.
 

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Aussie, just my 02 ok. After working in iron workers & carpenters union as a young man, I dealt w/a lot of these bosses. Though they were somewhat limited being union, stil azzholes. Pretty tough then. This was not for me. Walked away for much less pay but no azzholes. Don’t fool yourself, those positions are out there. Start putting your feelers out for other G.C.’s. If he finds out so what. Fwiw, this is how I started on my own. I was looking elsewhere & word got back. Best thing that ever happened for me. This led to government contracts once I got my ducks lined up @ 28 years old. I had a lot of contacts which really helped me. Keep all contacts you come across, they will help your future. As I’ve stated before, I held my chin up & never hesitated to spool up from any red flag situations from then on. Currently am the go to for a group of bankers/investors on Comm. They respect me & I respect them. But — if things get crossways, I’ll tell the boys to spool em up & get their hats. You don’t have to take his chit. Tough enough dealing w/engineers, preme subs etc. Get your feelers out there. He’ll change his tune. Best of luck


Mike
 

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Its all a test of personality or setting your fot failure. What it is, it is irrelevant. You still have to do what you have to do.

This happens very often. Remember, your boss wants to blame you for any failure and take credit for any of your success.

The trick here is to be honest and sound confident.

As a rookie, they want to see if you have within you, the personal skills that work for the position (they know you lack experience and maybe technical skills, all those can be gained or taught). They want to see how you work/react under pressure, how you learn what you dont know, assertive, leadership, etc. This is more innate (or more individual related and hard to teach). It is better, if you have those skills or traits already or have the attitude to it.

Also few to no job last forever. Take what you need (money, experience, knowledge) and then move on if neeeded.

Most jobs you do nothing on day 1 or 2. On my current job I wsd thrown to the fire/lions right away. I handled it like everyday business and when the time came to praise me I said: "I took it as a test and just so you know I can take way more than that".
 

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It’s been my experience that the people that yell the loudest usually don’t know as much as they want you to think they know. They compensate by trying to intimidate.

There’s no need for people to be a dick on a job site especially if you work for the same company. People who build teams and foster unity end up with a better running system than insecure people who don’t know everything who try to use the old technique of intimidation to get results.

I’d either leave that job or I’d beat his ass. But letting him go on like that, no.

Start to expose the things he doesn’t know and see how much he likes it. Maybe you’ll have his job soon. He’s the problem.
 
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