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So Your Friend's Wife Says....

 
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Old 11-02-2014, 11:55 AM   #41
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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Originally Posted by Agility View Post

I'm not married yet but I'd hate to think an argument about a bathroom would end a marriage.
Before you do get married you had better get good at predicting the future because you never know what will set some women off. Could be anything, you just never know.
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Old 11-02-2014, 12:21 PM   #42
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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Before you do get married you had better get good at predicting the future because you never know what will set some women off. Could be anything, you just never know.
So much truth in that post.
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Old 11-02-2014, 12:24 PM   #43
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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Originally Posted by one cut View Post
Before you do get married you had better get good at predicting the future because you never know what will set some women off. Could be anything, you just never know.
And it can vary from morning to afternoon to evening and switch with days & weeks also....
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Old 11-02-2014, 12:25 PM   #44
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


I love to just help friends.........but I never figured out how this problem the original poster has till it was a time when I liked the husband but wasn't a fan of the wife.

I could tell that the wife needed leverage against the husband and was recruiting me to prove how to stick it to him in an argument. I realized I was just a pawn in their GAME.

If I am watching a buddy do things hackery like. Then I present it like some super secret I just discovered. "Oh hey I just learned this cool trick the other day from an old timer.......can I show you how to (whatever) and I can't wait to show off to someone what he taught me....I thought it was pretty cool" (even though you had been doing it for years)
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Old 11-02-2014, 12:31 PM   #45
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


Sometimes just asking a question is enough guidance.
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Old 11-02-2014, 03:02 PM   #46
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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Originally Posted by Unger.const View Post
..."Oh hey I just learned this cool trick the other day from an old timer.......can I show you how to (whatever) and I can't wait to show off to someone what he taught me....I thought it was pretty cool" (even though you had been doing it for years)
Or, "Oh hey, I just learned this cool trick the other day. You pick up the phone and call someone who knows what he's doing, you cheap bastard." Only to a good friend, and with a smile.
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Old 11-02-2014, 03:33 PM   #47
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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Originally Posted by CarpenterSFO View Post

Or, "Oh hey, I just learned this cool trick the other day. You pick up the phone and call someone who knows what he's doing, you cheap bastard." Only to a good friend, and with a smile.
I've found that most of the time my friends aren't rich so it's a matter of not having the money to pay someone to do it. (Being that the marriage is good) if they have money they either ask you to do it or hide the project from you with something like "my folks wanted to pay for our remodel of what ever so they picked their usual guy to do it"
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Old 11-02-2014, 03:37 PM   #48
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


Why would you not tell someone how to do things right? Quit worrying about feelings and worry about the long term. They'll thank you eventually.
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Old 11-02-2014, 04:02 PM   #49
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


Buddies of mine tend to know what I do for a living and know they can't usually achieve the same results. So I do try to keep my mouth shut but if they ask about a specific way to do something I tell them without putting down their work too bad.

I tried showing some friends how to tape and texture on their old place. When they got a new place they did a lot better than the last but you could still see the seems. He knew it. They came over to my place a while back to look at our addition and both the wife and husband couldn't stop looking at the walls and ceiling at every angle to try to find my seems. It was comical to say the least.
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Old 11-02-2014, 06:23 PM   #50
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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Originally Posted by CrpntrFrk View Post
Buddies of mine tend to know what I do for a living and know they can't usually achieve the same results. So I do try to keep my mouth shut but if they ask about a specific way to do something I tell them without putting down their work too bad.

I tried showing some friends how to tape and texture on their old place. When they got a new place they did a lot better than the last but you could still see the seems. He knew it. They came over to my place a while back to look at our addition and both the wife and husband couldn't stop looking at the walls and ceiling at every angle to try to find my seems. It was comical to say the least.
That's how they learn not just anybody can do it - they tried and found out for themselves....
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Old 11-02-2014, 07:27 PM   #51
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


I guess it depends on how good of friends you are. My best friend said he was giving his bath a face lift. I said I would be over tomorrow night. It wasn't even a question. When he tries to leave the ugly blue 60's tile up, I said I will be over wed with some bead board and trim to go over it so it actually looked like it was freshened up.
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Old 11-03-2014, 01:51 PM   #52
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


Yet another reason to never remodel your own house. It will end your marriage.
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Old 11-03-2014, 05:50 PM   #53
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


I will always pick my buddy's side in an argument, but I'm also brutally honest with them. If I think that they are doing something wrong, I will tell them. But I will tell them, not their S.O., which to me would be belittling them.

I usually just show up and hang out. If they want me to do it, they can pay me. But just showing up is helpful sometimes. Like my buddy who decided to reno his basement, making an open layout basement suite kitchen and living room. I showed up 3 studs into him tearing out the load bearing wall...
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Old 11-03-2014, 08:45 PM   #54
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


Quote:
Originally Posted by one cut View Post
Before you do get married you had better get good at predicting the future because you never know what will set some women off. Could be anything, you just never know.
"So, I've already asked my husband (your buddy, who's downstairs bending nails and out of earshot) now I'll ask you. Does this dress make me look fat?"
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Old 11-03-2014, 10:13 PM   #55
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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Originally Posted by Golden view View Post
Why would you not tell someone how to do things right?
BECAUSE you never go into another man's house and tell him that he's doing it wrong!
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Old 11-04-2014, 08:35 AM   #56
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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BECAUSE you never go into another man's house and tell him that he's doing it wrong!
Unless he's doing it wrong...



I'm a fan of "hey, I got a trick for that"
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Old 11-04-2014, 10:07 AM   #57
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


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Originally Posted by one cut View Post
Before you do get married you had better get good at predicting the future because you never know what will set some women off. Could be anything, you just never know.
Some of the best advice I've ever read on this board right there and considering the level of talent and expertise here, that's saying a lot.
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Old 11-04-2014, 04:40 PM   #58
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


For the record, we were pissed off about something else but managed to forget about it. Then, you said something stupid and it reminded of what originally made us mad. Now, we're mad about the original issue, the second issue and the fact that we forgot about the first.

And I would definitely stay out of your buddies bath remodel project. If you have time and inclination, there are probably many other people who you could help who would really appreciate your efforts!
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Old 11-05-2014, 02:46 PM   #59
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


Been there and done that. There is nothing good that will come out of anything you can tell them. Let them go ahead and screw it up. Because if you do offer to help you will be 1) working for free, 2) completing a project that is already below your level of acceptable quality, 3) making your buddy look like a fool in front of his wife.

That is why I have a friend who lives is a house that is 27 inches out of square with 7/16" OSB for sub-floor, 11" stair risers, and a kitchen layout so bad they have to prep their food on the dining room table.
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Old 11-12-2014, 01:07 PM   #60
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Re: So Your Friend's Wife Says....


gotta follow the bro code:

"aiding and abetting the wife/gf of a bro for the purpose of providing information or events that can be used against the bro at a future time, or prove bro's inferiority to his wife/gf is strictly prohibited. "

"offering advise to a bro, under these situations, is offered under duress. "

"bro should help bro, but without the knowledge of the gf/wife, and also without the gf/wife obtaining knowledge that the bro had done any wrongdoing. "

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