Is This Where You Put The Jokes?

mrmojo

i looked around and didnt see anyother place so.....
oh yeah thanks for the cool site nathan -lots of info little bit of fun
Pedro and Maria got married. Pedro was a "man about town" so to speak, but Maria was very naive and uninformed about the birds and the bees.
Pedro was a poor working man and could not afford to take time off for a honeymoon. So, that night they retired to his little shack. When Pedro was undressing Maria said, "Oh Pedro, what is that?"
Pedro being very quick thinking said, "Maria, I am the only man in the world with one of these." And, then, he proceeded to show her what it was for, and Maria was happy.
The next morning Pedro went off to work as usual. When he returned home that evening, Maria was on the front porch obviously upset about something.
"Pedro, you told me that you were the only man in the world with one of those, and I saw Gonzalez the gardener changing his clothes behind the shed, and he had one, too."
Thinking fast, Pedro said, "Oh, Maria, Gonzalez is my very best friend. I had two of them so I gave him one. He is the only other man in the world with one of those."
Maria being very stupid accepted his answer and they did their thing again that night.
Pedro went off to work again the next morning and when he returned home, Maria was very upset, stamping her foot on the porch.
Pedro said, "Maria, what is the matter now?"
"Pedro, you gave Gonzalez the best one!"
=================================
Ma was in the kitchen fiddling around when she hollers out...
"Pa, You need to go out and fix the outhouse!"
Pa replies, "There ain't nuthin wrong with the outhouse."
Ma yells back, "Yes there is, now git out there and fix it."
So... Pa mosies out to the outhouse, looks around and yells back, "Ma There ain't nuthin wrong with the outhouse!"
Ma replies, "Stick yur head in the hole!"
Pa yells back, "I ain't stickin my head in that hole!"
Ma says, "Ya have to stick yur head in the hole to see what to fix."
So with that, Pa sticks his head in the hole,looks around and yells back, "Ma, There ain't nuthin wrong with this outhouse!"
Ma hollers back, "Now take your head out of the hole!"
Pa proceeds to pull his head out of the hole, then starts yelling, "Ma, Help! My beard is stuck in the cracks in the toilet seat!"
To which Ma replies, "Hurt's, don't it ?!"

maj

ROFLMAO.... That's really funny.

There are some Amish folks live about 30 miles from me. Kind thought of them right away on that last joke.

CE1

Try following this logic:

"The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large."

But did you know that if a second short fortuneteller also escaped at about the same time, there would be an extra small medium at large?

And if that second short fortuneteller had grown very fat, it would read, an extra large extra small medium at large.

Now, if a third, big fortuneteller's attempted escape had been thwarted, it would read, the escape of a large medium cut short.

And what if a really big fortuneteller's name was Small? Would it read, "The extra large medium was Small?"