Canadian Foxworthy

Chris Johnson

[FONT='Verdana','sans-serif'] Subject: Canadian Humor - REDNECK style

A Little Canadian Humor

Forget Rednecks, here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about
Canucks

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May,
you may live in Canada.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they
don't work there, you may live in Canada.

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in
Canada

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who
dialed a wrong number, you may live in Canada

If "Vacation" means going anywhere south of Muncie for the weekend,
you may live in Canada.

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Canada

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you
may live in Canada

If you have switched from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back
again, you may live in Canada

If you can drive 90 kms/hr through 2 feet of snow during a raging
blizzard without flinching, you may live in Canada

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave
both unlocked, you may live in Canada

If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use
them, you may live in Canada

If you design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit,
you may live in Canada

If the speed limit on the highway is 80km -- you're going 90 and
everybody is passing you, you may live in Canada

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and
road construction, you may live in Canada

If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you may
live in Canada.

If you find 2 degrees "a little chilly", you may live in Canada

If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all
your Canadian friends & others, you definitely live in Canada[/FONT]

__________________
Chris

woodmagman

One of my guys is cutting tile for a bathroom and wearing ear protection all day. Mid afternoon his phone starts to vibrate in his pocket, it is the city police. They tell him his car has been in an accident. There is no way, it is parked in front of the house he is working on and it should be there. He goes out to investigate and can not see it. He rushes to the curb and sees it 7 feet back from were it was park. It was being block from view by one of our trailers. Sure enough the rear of the car is totalled. The back bumper looks like Twelve Foot Davies hockey stick, ready to make a slap shot. On the window is a note with the drivers name, number and an apology, stating that he had called the police and would file a report.
ONLY IN CANADA

reveivl

I got 10 out of 16, maybe I'm Canadian?

__________________
From where does knowledge come? If you need to know what is in a box, you could ask someone (not reliable), you could pray, (not useful), you can consult with the scripture (not helpful) or you could open the box (science)

Bill_Vincent

Or MAINE!! I can identify with just about every one of them!!

Well, except for the "lengthy conversation". As for the 4 seasons, What you all call road construction season, we call MUD season!! That's when you need 36x15 mudlug tires just to get to the job site!! A skidder is your friend!!

__________________
"Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're probably right."

http://www.creativeceramicandmarble.com

bluehomes

yer makin me miss home eh

BUTCHERMAN

No, you might be a redneck.

mickeyco

If you're calling a piece of ham, bacon, you're definitely a Canadian, bacon my ass.









.

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Some people climb mountains. I take out the trash. But we both do it for the same reason.

Bkessler

If you think Don Cherry is a snazzy dresser, your canadian.

Or

If your still upset about the Gretzky trade, your candadian

shanekw1

Gretzky's a crying baby.

__________________

Bkessler

You mean "the great one"! for shame, he cried to 212 points in a season. I think Lemiux is the one your thinking of.

shanekw1

I was thinking more of when Canada got silver in Nagano.

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hughjazz

Personally I like pork and pork products in all their forms

That chubby guy looks scrumptious

Attached Images

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